Posted by: mygentlecloud | August 10, 2013

Get What You Want – Elle Special

This post is copied from Elle Special : March 2013 edition as I couldn’t find an online link to this article and I wanted to remember the useful pointers. It is written by Stacey Anne Rodriques.

Here are 10 tips she shared to play nice and get on the right track:

1) Always be polite first – Make the first move with a simple “hello” or “morning”

2) Mind your P’s and Q’s – “Please” and “thank you” transform a demand into a request – nobody wants to be barked at, and everybody could use a little appreciation, even if what you’re asking of them is ultimately a basic requirement of their job.

3) Know your janitor – In other words, don’t just be chummy with the big bosses. Know your peers and the interns and the cleaners etc. Treating people differently based on their rank or perceived status in society just sets off an awful cycle whereby your subordinates could do the same to the people below them and so on.

4) Stop trying to be a man as it has dire consequences

5) Remember it’s always personal – To the other person, that it. Thinking this way ensures you’re always aware of saying things with tact, instead of shooting your mouth off and suffering foot-in-mouth syndrome. You can’t ignore the human dynamic and fallibility that exists in an office. Not everybody has high self-esteem and skin as thick as rhinos. And not everybody easily shows that they’re upset by what you’ve said or done. So don’t make enemies by accident.

6) Accept that you don’t know everything – Be humble, admit that you’re lacking in certain skills, and ask your colleague for advice on how she secured that promotion or won that account.

7) Don’t smile. Talk – smiling when you’re talking looks and sounds fake. Don’t do it.

8) Make eye contact – otherwise it may appear that you’re too busy for the other person or are not confident of what you’re saying

9) Speak less. Speak slowly – Motivational speakers speak in a very measured manner. You should speak lower, slower, louder – an authoritative tone without sounding demanding.

10) Stop being passive-aggressive – Learn to speak your mind at the right time instead of holding everything and then letting out your frustrations at moments when the recipient of your sarcasm doesn’t understand what the real problem is. The issue at hand may not even warrant such anger in the first place, and you may look like some who flies off the handle at very minor issues. When you do that, you just come across angsty, moody and temperamental, because no one can isolate the cause of your anger, and others would want to give you a wide-berth to avoid your random outbursts.

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